Had a wee bit of a lie-in on Friday, basking in the silence free from the annoying tinnitus! Got up and cleaned my room, fresh sheets on the bed etc. I decided to wash my hair before I go in to the doctor - was really, really... REALLY! looking forward to having a bath and washing my hair this morning!
Had a bit of a strop when I realised some eejit had just went and used up ALL the hot water!!!!!! GRRRRRR! Instead of a bath had to use the electric shower. The bath had to wait... I was so cross, I was almost late for the doctor's appointment!
The new GP, Maya, was young, pretty, chic and pregnant; I felt so drab, fat and ugly beside her! I didn’t feel the stitches coming out at all. The Swine Flu Vaccine was another matter - it hurt like hell! Inspecting my scar, Maya thought it would benefit from staying dry for a week at least and asked me not to wash my hair til next weekend(!) Urgh!
Later on that evening I felt really cold, achy, run down and really miserable - a side affect of the vaccine I guess? I was still snapping at everyone too. By 6pm the tinnitus came stomping back with a vengeance.
Had to stay up and wait for my mum to arrive. She came back to Dublin for her cousin's wife's removal/wake and was staying with me til the funeral next day. Mum didn't arrive til after 12:30am... at 10pm I was so bored, I broke my self-imposed break from playing poker and started playing with my free player points (I deliberately emptied all poker accounts for this month!) on PokerStars. And won my seats in the Joe Cada 100k game (Joe Cada won the World's biggest and most prestige poker competition WSOP last week) and the Sunday 250k game! Naturally my mum arrives as I'm in all these... and the criticism starts. She really doesn't see what I see in poker, she thinks its 'correct' to gamble on 'any two cards' that it is not a sport, there's no skill in it, its all luck, gambling and vice! I just ignored her - just wait til I get my big win and lets see what she says then! LOL! The tinnitus was roaring away and I was dying for my bed.
I just hope this tinnitus is just temporarily due to stress of the operation, tiredness, overdoing things and being slightly run-down from the affects of the antibiotics pumped into my system last week. Would hate to see it continuing...
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Pain, tinnitus and tiredness...
I really overdid things last Monday/Tuesday after I came home from hospital.
My mum who had stayed up minding my children while I was in hospital had to go home to Roscommon on Tuesday night; I made most of her (while she was still in Dublin)on Monday to take me to another medical appointment (non-CI related) food shopping, bank, etc., as I wasn't allowed to drive. I love my mother very much but she has a different way of doing things, I spend most of Tuesday putting stuff back in their proper places! My clothes were mixed up - some of my good tops were in my pyjama draw, while the pyjama tops were ironed and hanging in the wardrobe! LOL!
By Tuesday evening the whole of my left side of face/ear/head started to throb painfully! I took two paracetamol - had nothing else and it barely took the edge of the pain... I got rip-roaring tinnitus in the left ear, which went on for hours! By 11pm I was so bad, throwing all caution to the wind, I took off in the car to the local 24 hour pharmacy to get a stronger painkiller. The pharmacist recommended Solpadine; I took it gratefully and zoomed the 2 miles back to my house. The Solpadine worked really fast!
They must have given me a slow-releasing painkiller in hospital, can’t believe I’m getting all this pain and trouble now! Am kicking myself for not asking for prescription leaving hospital.
Waking up on Wednesday morning, the throbbing was still there but the tinnitus was gone. Dosed up again on Solpadine, I plonked myself on the sofa with a blanket, barely moved from there all day! But the tinnitus came back in the evening. Urgh! I went to bed at 10pm totally fed up!
I rarely get tinnitus. Previous attacks usually start as a loud 'Ooooooo' in my ear gradually getting lower and lower til its just 'white noise' that fades after a few seconds. I tend to get them in my right ear more than my left. Previous attacks usually last about 3-5 minutes, no longer... This week the tinnitus is mindblowing! It's following in the same pattern, but in my left ear, the 'oooooOOOOOOoooo' keeps going - resonating high then low then high again. And lasting for hours! It's not painful - just annoying...
The rest and early night on Wednesday did the trick (or perhaps it was the Solpadine?!) I felt great on Thursday morning! Resting up all day, I wanted to be fit to attend Deaf Artist Jane O'Brien's art exhibition in the Loving Spoon Cafe that evening. Popping into my GP to make the appointment for Friday to remove the stitches and get the Swine Flu vaccine, the receptionist was astounded to see me. ‘You had the operation already?!’ Yes, my dear I did! We had a chat about the operation; I showed off my scar and secured an appointment the next day with one of the new GPs working in the Clinic. I usually see Dr Fiona or Dr Orla, but both were not available.
The exhibition was so interesting! As a deaf artist Jane uses a lot of deaf materials in her work. A set of (now obsolete) minicoms had been painted and devilled to create a interesting sculpture; ear mould impressions feature heavily in a most of the sculptures. She had several pieces that really intrigued me and I related a lot to. My favourite was the 'Big D/Little d' paint-sculpture – it really sums up the identity crisis that I struggled with as part of the Deafhood process – really wish I had the money to buy it!
Art is something I appreciate and love; I started out looking for a career in art before realising I wasn’t talented enough to continue. I count some well known artists as good friends including the renowned artist - Amanda Coogan. I enjoy going to Art galleries and losing myself in them... since the arrival of my children I haven’t devoted as much time as I like to artistic endeavours. My house is not full of the art work that, when moving in I had promised I’d fill the walls with! A resolution I plan to make good on in future...
Heading home after the exhibition the tinnitus came roaring back strangely this time I had it in the right ear! Then the throbbing started again. Urgh! No more outings for me for the next few days...
Rest! Rest! Rest!
My mum who had stayed up minding my children while I was in hospital had to go home to Roscommon on Tuesday night; I made most of her (while she was still in Dublin)on Monday to take me to another medical appointment (non-CI related) food shopping, bank, etc., as I wasn't allowed to drive. I love my mother very much but she has a different way of doing things, I spend most of Tuesday putting stuff back in their proper places! My clothes were mixed up - some of my good tops were in my pyjama draw, while the pyjama tops were ironed and hanging in the wardrobe! LOL!
By Tuesday evening the whole of my left side of face/ear/head started to throb painfully! I took two paracetamol - had nothing else and it barely took the edge of the pain... I got rip-roaring tinnitus in the left ear, which went on for hours! By 11pm I was so bad, throwing all caution to the wind, I took off in the car to the local 24 hour pharmacy to get a stronger painkiller. The pharmacist recommended Solpadine; I took it gratefully and zoomed the 2 miles back to my house. The Solpadine worked really fast!
They must have given me a slow-releasing painkiller in hospital, can’t believe I’m getting all this pain and trouble now! Am kicking myself for not asking for prescription leaving hospital.
Waking up on Wednesday morning, the throbbing was still there but the tinnitus was gone. Dosed up again on Solpadine, I plonked myself on the sofa with a blanket, barely moved from there all day! But the tinnitus came back in the evening. Urgh! I went to bed at 10pm totally fed up!
I rarely get tinnitus. Previous attacks usually start as a loud 'Ooooooo' in my ear gradually getting lower and lower til its just 'white noise' that fades after a few seconds. I tend to get them in my right ear more than my left. Previous attacks usually last about 3-5 minutes, no longer... This week the tinnitus is mindblowing! It's following in the same pattern, but in my left ear, the 'oooooOOOOOOoooo' keeps going - resonating high then low then high again. And lasting for hours! It's not painful - just annoying...
The rest and early night on Wednesday did the trick (or perhaps it was the Solpadine?!) I felt great on Thursday morning! Resting up all day, I wanted to be fit to attend Deaf Artist Jane O'Brien's art exhibition in the Loving Spoon Cafe that evening. Popping into my GP to make the appointment for Friday to remove the stitches and get the Swine Flu vaccine, the receptionist was astounded to see me. ‘You had the operation already?!’ Yes, my dear I did! We had a chat about the operation; I showed off my scar and secured an appointment the next day with one of the new GPs working in the Clinic. I usually see Dr Fiona or Dr Orla, but both were not available.
The exhibition was so interesting! As a deaf artist Jane uses a lot of deaf materials in her work. A set of (now obsolete) minicoms had been painted and devilled to create a interesting sculpture; ear mould impressions feature heavily in a most of the sculptures. She had several pieces that really intrigued me and I related a lot to. My favourite was the 'Big D/Little d' paint-sculpture – it really sums up the identity crisis that I struggled with as part of the Deafhood process – really wish I had the money to buy it!
Art is something I appreciate and love; I started out looking for a career in art before realising I wasn’t talented enough to continue. I count some well known artists as good friends including the renowned artist - Amanda Coogan. I enjoy going to Art galleries and losing myself in them... since the arrival of my children I haven’t devoted as much time as I like to artistic endeavours. My house is not full of the art work that, when moving in I had promised I’d fill the walls with! A resolution I plan to make good on in future...
Heading home after the exhibition the tinnitus came roaring back strangely this time I had it in the right ear! Then the throbbing started again. Urgh! No more outings for me for the next few days...
Rest! Rest! Rest!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Home Sweet Home!
The rest of the time in hospital was fine, had a few visitors and watched all of Grey's Anatomy series 3 DVD. Mum brought me home yesterday morning, trying to chill out but its not easy - I keep moving around, cleaning this, sorting that... didn't get to bed til late last night. By 6pm today - I knew I had overdid things, my ear started to throb something awful! This was the first time I felt any pain in the implant area...
The doctor forgot to give me a prescription leaving the hospital so I had to make do with soluble solpadine and paracetamol. It's taken the edge off the pain but its still throbbing something funny... feels like the magnet part above my ear is trying to pop out! Hope that feeling is gone tomorrow. I'm also shattered - early bed for me tonight.
I've been instructed to go to my GP on Friday to get stitches removed plus get the Swine Flu vaccine... THEN I can wash my hair!!! Looking forward to that! It feels like I've greasy manky smelly rags on my head every time I reach up to touch it. I love to be one of those people who leave their hair be and let it self-cleanse itself as nature allows but the dried blood, disinfectant residue and god-knows-what-else left behind after surgery will need washing first! Don't know if I have the patience to let it go...
Have a friend's art exhibition launch on Thursday night - really hope I'll be fit to attend, need to find a hat to cover the manky mop first though!
The doctor forgot to give me a prescription leaving the hospital so I had to make do with soluble solpadine and paracetamol. It's taken the edge off the pain but its still throbbing something funny... feels like the magnet part above my ear is trying to pop out! Hope that feeling is gone tomorrow. I'm also shattered - early bed for me tonight.
I've been instructed to go to my GP on Friday to get stitches removed plus get the Swine Flu vaccine... THEN I can wash my hair!!! Looking forward to that! It feels like I've greasy manky smelly rags on my head every time I reach up to touch it. I love to be one of those people who leave their hair be and let it self-cleanse itself as nature allows but the dried blood, disinfectant residue and god-knows-what-else left behind after surgery will need washing first! Don't know if I have the patience to let it go...
Have a friend's art exhibition launch on Thursday night - really hope I'll be fit to attend, need to find a hat to cover the manky mop first though!
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Post-Op day 2
I woke up with horrible stomach cramps, feeling wrecked! Ray stopped by as I was just finished breakfast – my phone battery died so I asked him if he could charge it for me. We were signing away in ISL when NFH appeared. She just stood there watching us warily. Ray then signed ‘I think your new friend thinks we are talking about her...’ I responded ‘don’t care, let her think that!’
NFH made a big show of checking my wristband every time I was due to get my medication (none of the other nurses did this – just asked me my name or DOB), joking at her to ease the tension that I was hardly going to be different identity every time but NFS replied dourly ‘Its regulations we have to check every time’ Lovely beside manner hasn’t she (!)
The Ward Doctor and Surgeon Team called around to confirm they are happy with my progress I can go home on Monday. YAY!!!!
I’ve a discharge letter to give to my GP for priority request to get the Swine Flu vaccine. I’m not allowed back to work without it; clarifying with Ward Doctor about the myths surrounding the vaccine – she put my mind at ease declaring them all to be ‘Bullshit!’ Asking when I would be allowed back to work – the doctor says when I feel fit but no driving for at least 14 days post-op, meaning back to work on or about Thursday 19th November – as I need my car for work.
Jenny popped in after lunch looking a million dollars with her snazzy new haircut and bringing me the best thing ever – hair bobbles to tie my matted hair back up! She’s considering the CI herself... and had thousands of questions to ask!
Catherine came around in the afternoon with this huge box from Cochlear containing the processor, warrantee, carry bag, DVD etc. Some things are missing and will be given to me on the switch on date. We chatted about the AB-v-Cochlear choice being unavailable and she apologised that the choice was not available not just for me but for 3-4 other patients recently. But if I was insistent on getting silver (red, blue or green even!) processor, multi-coloured covers or re-chargeable batteries - I can order it especially from Cochlear in UK, paying the cost myself; will look into this for sure! When Catherine handed me my letter confirming the official switch on I was dismayed to discover the date had been set for 13th January 2010! Eeek! Work won’t be too impressed as that the whole month (4 weeks block Tues-Thurs) is booked up with our ISL film project for Department of Social, Family & Community Affairs! I actually asked for this to be pushed out to January as I assumed I’d be tied up with my operation in November, then week off for CI switch-on, mapping appointments etc, in December. As this is a very important project - I be in the dog house if I re-changed the entire project dates again! Urgh!
Mum brought in both children to visit me; Mum used to work in Beaumont, she wanted to go down to the various sections that she used to work in but they had all left early to attend the protest march in City. The kids ate all the mandarin oranges, blew up rubber gloves and jumped away on the bed and stared at my scar, as NFH strode up and down watching with pursed lips. The Ward Sister came in and cooed over them, asking their names, if they rubbed their hands with the disinfectant gel, etc. Théa demonstrated how they used it both coming in and going out. Cal confirmed his dad gave him the money for his Tae Kwon Do competitions (that man is a saint) and told me about all the people in his class going to his new school (Callan got accepted into the second level school he really wanted to go to... his dad and I had reservations, but once he’s happy, we are happy) Mum came back and took them home. I miss them so much!
One hour later I got a lovely text from Catherine confirming a new set of dates in December, means Switch on 1 & 2 will be a week apart on 4th & 11th December with various other mapping on 16th and 22nd (TBC) along with confirmation for January dates to be on Monday or Fridays. Hey I’m happy to accept this than change the project dates again! Just sent a text to my manager to book them all off for me before the other staff members get their dates in the leave book!
Happy days! I even smiled at our dour NFH this evening as she stuck her temperature probe right into my ear in her usual rough manner!
Gerdi just text to say she’s on her way in to visit! More juicy gossip plus House and Gray’s Anatomy for watching later... ye think I’d have enough of hospitals at this stage?! LOL!
NFH made a big show of checking my wristband every time I was due to get my medication (none of the other nurses did this – just asked me my name or DOB), joking at her to ease the tension that I was hardly going to be different identity every time but NFS replied dourly ‘Its regulations we have to check every time’ Lovely beside manner hasn’t she (!)
The Ward Doctor and Surgeon Team called around to confirm they are happy with my progress I can go home on Monday. YAY!!!!
I’ve a discharge letter to give to my GP for priority request to get the Swine Flu vaccine. I’m not allowed back to work without it; clarifying with Ward Doctor about the myths surrounding the vaccine – she put my mind at ease declaring them all to be ‘Bullshit!’ Asking when I would be allowed back to work – the doctor says when I feel fit but no driving for at least 14 days post-op, meaning back to work on or about Thursday 19th November – as I need my car for work.
Jenny popped in after lunch looking a million dollars with her snazzy new haircut and bringing me the best thing ever – hair bobbles to tie my matted hair back up! She’s considering the CI herself... and had thousands of questions to ask!
Catherine came around in the afternoon with this huge box from Cochlear containing the processor, warrantee, carry bag, DVD etc. Some things are missing and will be given to me on the switch on date. We chatted about the AB-v-Cochlear choice being unavailable and she apologised that the choice was not available not just for me but for 3-4 other patients recently. But if I was insistent on getting silver (red, blue or green even!) processor, multi-coloured covers or re-chargeable batteries - I can order it especially from Cochlear in UK, paying the cost myself; will look into this for sure! When Catherine handed me my letter confirming the official switch on I was dismayed to discover the date had been set for 13th January 2010! Eeek! Work won’t be too impressed as that the whole month (4 weeks block Tues-Thurs) is booked up with our ISL film project for Department of Social, Family & Community Affairs! I actually asked for this to be pushed out to January as I assumed I’d be tied up with my operation in November, then week off for CI switch-on, mapping appointments etc, in December. As this is a very important project - I be in the dog house if I re-changed the entire project dates again! Urgh!
Mum brought in both children to visit me; Mum used to work in Beaumont, she wanted to go down to the various sections that she used to work in but they had all left early to attend the protest march in City. The kids ate all the mandarin oranges, blew up rubber gloves and jumped away on the bed and stared at my scar, as NFH strode up and down watching with pursed lips. The Ward Sister came in and cooed over them, asking their names, if they rubbed their hands with the disinfectant gel, etc. Théa demonstrated how they used it both coming in and going out. Cal confirmed his dad gave him the money for his Tae Kwon Do competitions (that man is a saint) and told me about all the people in his class going to his new school (Callan got accepted into the second level school he really wanted to go to... his dad and I had reservations, but once he’s happy, we are happy) Mum came back and took them home. I miss them so much!
One hour later I got a lovely text from Catherine confirming a new set of dates in December, means Switch on 1 & 2 will be a week apart on 4th & 11th December with various other mapping on 16th and 22nd (TBC) along with confirmation for January dates to be on Monday or Fridays. Hey I’m happy to accept this than change the project dates again! Just sent a text to my manager to book them all off for me before the other staff members get their dates in the leave book!
Happy days! I even smiled at our dour NFH this evening as she stuck her temperature probe right into my ear in her usual rough manner!
Gerdi just text to say she’s on her way in to visit! More juicy gossip plus House and Gray’s Anatomy for watching later... ye think I’d have enough of hospitals at this stage?! LOL!
Friday, November 6, 2009
...AND THE NEXT
Slept fine til 6am – woke up feeling mucus in my throat and while coughing to clear it I had a slight nosebleed. Sitting forward to grab a tissue to catch it, I notice the pressure bandage had came off! Called the nurse – both came replaced the bandage, drips, took my BP/Temperature etc. This time the bandage didn’t cover my right ear so I was able to put in my hearing aid in the non-implanted ear. I had the oxygen mask back on again because of the nose bleed and went back to sleep.
Woke up at 7:30am to see Ray smiling at me, asking how the day went yesterday I told him about NFH (who wasn’t on duty thankfully) the bum-flashing episode and the annoying eye grit. My eye felt so much better – a little dry but better than yesterday. Breakfast was being served and I was delighted that I was allowed to get my tray! While eating I was struck by a pain in my left jaw, just under the implant area. And was conscious that the left half my tongue was numb, as if I had just been to the dentist, I couldn’t taste a thing on the left side! Texting a few CI’ees I asked if this was normal, I got reassurances that it was...
Dr Viani stopped by with the Ward Doctor, remarked that the operation yesterday was a success, they switched on the implant in-situ and it worked ‘really well, thumbs up all around!’ She mentioned the eye problem – I gave her the update, saying the grit was gone. She reassured me that the eye specialist will have a look later, adding that it didn’t happen in her theatre as both my eyes had been well covered during the operation. She ordered xrays and instructed the ward doctor to remove the pressure bandage if all is well
I went for an X-ray and came back with impressive pictures of the implant coiling thru my head and springing into the cochlear. Took a few picture of the x-rays with my phone, not sure how they will look on the PC yet! Before I could get the bandage off I was wheeled down to the Othamantist to get my eye checked out. There was some scrape to the eyeball noted but since the offending grit had gone – just keep putting antibiotic cream etc for 3 more days. When the bandage came off, I was eager to see my scar! Kept taking photos with phone, using webcam to shoot a video as I couldn’t see it in the mirror! It was really clean – no bloody or gore, very neat incision with 6 nylon stitches holding it closed, running along the ear fold almost parallel to my lobe, you can’t see it unless I pull the ear lobe back. My entire ear felt numb to touch.
Ray came up at 4pm to have a look at the scar. Mum and Théa came in with Aunt Rita, Théa was delighted to see her ‘normal mammy with no scary stuff’ she brought in a book for me to read to her in-between all the conversations going on and shared a mountain of grapes with Théa. After they all left, my friend Aidan popped in with a DVD region-code-breaker for my laptop which was stubbornly refusing to allow me to watch Region 1 DVDs that Susie had given me. We had a good natter about poker – discussing all the upcoming games, the book Derek Kelly gave me, update gossip on poker players we knew etc. Susie came in 10 minutes after Aidan left, we caught up from where we left off last week– I was giving her the low down on the recent Deaf Poker Deepstack Festival and she was telling me about how they almost drowned in sangria and rain in Edinburgh last weekend at Niamh’s hen party! I was on a high today after the miserable experience yesterday!
NFH wasn’t on duty today thankfully, instead we had this lovely 60-year-old warm motherly Ward Sister coming in all friendly chit-chat with everyone: ‘How is your eye now? Ah good, good! Is your lunch okay pet? Wasn’t that lasagne nice? The porter will be here for you in a moment, love, to bring you to X-ray... ’ She was a ray of sunshine, skipping into the ward with a warm smile on her face, making everyone feel special. Then stopping by all the beds saying good-night individually to all the patients before she left for the night.
I watched 5 episodes of House (series 1 DVD) back-to-back before falling into a restless sleep, kept waking up every 2-3 hours with mad dreams involving NFH, curtain-less beds and leaking bedpans!
Woke up at 7:30am to see Ray smiling at me, asking how the day went yesterday I told him about NFH (who wasn’t on duty thankfully) the bum-flashing episode and the annoying eye grit. My eye felt so much better – a little dry but better than yesterday. Breakfast was being served and I was delighted that I was allowed to get my tray! While eating I was struck by a pain in my left jaw, just under the implant area. And was conscious that the left half my tongue was numb, as if I had just been to the dentist, I couldn’t taste a thing on the left side! Texting a few CI’ees I asked if this was normal, I got reassurances that it was...
Dr Viani stopped by with the Ward Doctor, remarked that the operation yesterday was a success, they switched on the implant in-situ and it worked ‘really well, thumbs up all around!’ She mentioned the eye problem – I gave her the update, saying the grit was gone. She reassured me that the eye specialist will have a look later, adding that it didn’t happen in her theatre as both my eyes had been well covered during the operation. She ordered xrays and instructed the ward doctor to remove the pressure bandage if all is well
I went for an X-ray and came back with impressive pictures of the implant coiling thru my head and springing into the cochlear. Took a few picture of the x-rays with my phone, not sure how they will look on the PC yet! Before I could get the bandage off I was wheeled down to the Othamantist to get my eye checked out. There was some scrape to the eyeball noted but since the offending grit had gone – just keep putting antibiotic cream etc for 3 more days. When the bandage came off, I was eager to see my scar! Kept taking photos with phone, using webcam to shoot a video as I couldn’t see it in the mirror! It was really clean – no bloody or gore, very neat incision with 6 nylon stitches holding it closed, running along the ear fold almost parallel to my lobe, you can’t see it unless I pull the ear lobe back. My entire ear felt numb to touch.
Ray came up at 4pm to have a look at the scar. Mum and Théa came in with Aunt Rita, Théa was delighted to see her ‘normal mammy with no scary stuff’ she brought in a book for me to read to her in-between all the conversations going on and shared a mountain of grapes with Théa. After they all left, my friend Aidan popped in with a DVD region-code-breaker for my laptop which was stubbornly refusing to allow me to watch Region 1 DVDs that Susie had given me. We had a good natter about poker – discussing all the upcoming games, the book Derek Kelly gave me, update gossip on poker players we knew etc. Susie came in 10 minutes after Aidan left, we caught up from where we left off last week– I was giving her the low down on the recent Deaf Poker Deepstack Festival and she was telling me about how they almost drowned in sangria and rain in Edinburgh last weekend at Niamh’s hen party! I was on a high today after the miserable experience yesterday!
NFH wasn’t on duty today thankfully, instead we had this lovely 60-year-old warm motherly Ward Sister coming in all friendly chit-chat with everyone: ‘How is your eye now? Ah good, good! Is your lunch okay pet? Wasn’t that lasagne nice? The porter will be here for you in a moment, love, to bring you to X-ray... ’ She was a ray of sunshine, skipping into the ward with a warm smile on her face, making everyone feel special. Then stopping by all the beds saying good-night individually to all the patients before she left for the night.
I watched 5 episodes of House (series 1 DVD) back-to-back before falling into a restless sleep, kept waking up every 2-3 hours with mad dreams involving NFH, curtain-less beds and leaking bedpans!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
D-Day 4th Nov 2009
D-Day today –no going back now! Sorry this report is long... so much happened!
Was woken by nurse at 6am to take my BP, temperature, pulse and get measured for my white anti-clotting stockings. Got the stockings and gown at 7am, went for my shower. I didn’t bother washing my hair – most CI’ees told me that they washed their hair but said it was a waste of time; my hair was still clean from previous day so I left it. Went back to my bed, read my book, did a video diary entry via PC Webcam (don’t have permission to use camera in ward but can use PC webcam) and waited to be brought down to theatre.
Trolley came for me at 11am, I had expected to leave my hearing-aids at my bed and just bring my glasses but they said no, only hearing aids allowed in-situ in Theatre, not glasses! Was dismayed – my lip-reading skills is way better than my residual hearing, would rather have my glasses over the HA’s any day!
The guy pushing my trolley was a total joker very easy to understand, while waiting for the lift he started teasing this skinny petite blonde nurse carrying my file; as another trolley with patient came to share our lift he teased our nurse that there wouldn’t be room for her in lift! When the lift came – it was tiny! But they managed to fit two trolleys in side by side with the Joker plus the other guy pushing them plus two ward nurses... The Joker turned on my nurse “Wow! You manage to fit in did ya? Go on, I let ya push the button – pick any button...” as the lift went up instead of down to the Theatre floor, the Joker drawled at me really seriously “Jaysus, ya can’t trust a blonde to know the difference between up and down these days, can ya?” We all burst out laughing... The blonde nurse included! Great way to break the nervous tension I must add!
As I got into the Theatre waiting room, the blonde nurse handed my file to an African Theatre Nurse, who proceeded to talk to me – I was totally at loss! I didn’t understand her at all, not sure if it was because she was a non-national (very difficult to lip-read) or the fact I couldn’t see her clearly... I started apologising that I hadn’t my glasses on to see her properly. She gave poor Nurse Blonde a right ticking off for not allowing me to bring my glasses! She started to tick various boxes on my file, dumping my file on my bed and wandered off. I was curious and miffed to see what she had ticked for me, wanted to ensure she had put correct info but spotted nothing serious or incorrect... glancing thru the papers I noticed my blood test results had some odd results which concerned me – spotting a different name on top of the page ‘James ...’ waving Nurse Blonde over – I pointed it out to her silently, she gasped then removed the papers quickly before the Theatre Nurse came back to take my file adding the docket to clear me for admission into the Theatre. Just hope they had my results going in!
I was in the pre-theatre room for 5 minutes, saying hello to various people setting up my EGG monitor, drips, etc., none of whom I had met before! None of the team who visited my bed yesterday appeared either! Then the door opened and Dr Viani appeared –I was so glad to see a familiar face! Was having a moment that I might be in the wrong theatre! She grasped my hand and spoke to me – I motioned her to come forward as I couldn’t lip-read without my glasses. She repeated her greeting adding if I was alright, I nodded, asking if I would be implanted with the AB implant as I had hoped. She shook her head: ‘No I will be implanting you with the Nucleus. The Cochlear Nucleus is a more stable product. I would need to do a different operation for Advance Bionic Implant - I don’t have enough practice on implanting them just yet. Trust me, the Nucleus has a proven excellent track results, you will be fine.... Okay?’ She smiled at me, patting my arm reassuringly. I nodded. Instead of getting my aesthentic by injection into the drip, I got it via mask... it took forever! I must have counted to 50-something before I went under!
Coming around in the recovery room, I was in a sitting up position with oxygen mask on. Putting my hand up to my head, I felt the bandage but it wasn’t as big or tight as I was lead to believe. The doctor with the firm handshake from yesterday appeared. For some strange reason I thought, they didn’t do the operation! That I was opened up and closed again with no implant! Then suddenly I felt a horrible burning sensation in my right eye!
I asked “Did you do the implant? Is it over?”
-‘Oh yes, it went really well! Are you in pain?’
-‘There’s something in my eye – something sticking into it...’
-‘Okay, I’ll have a look... it looks red, can’t see anything, will get saline to wash it...’
When she came back with saline – two drops and my eyeball burned! ‘Owwww! ‘ I cried out, she backed off, “no, it is just initial burning – it’s still there, can you put more in please...” she poured the rest of the saline in, the relief was good but only temporary. I could feel the grit was still there scraping the eyeball as I moved my eye. Urrgh! I asked for the saline wash 3 times more, but no avail – the grit or whatever it was wasn’t shifting.
I don’t remember getting back to my ward, but the Ward doctor appeared concerned about the eye, which was getting worse. Begging for more saline to wash out the grit, she reassured me that they were trying to locate an Eye doctor for me. I kept asking, begging, for the saline – my eyeball was burning like mad! Finally a nurse appeared with the saline droplets as the doctor ran off to make a phone call - opening my eyelid, I asked the Nurse to put some on the top of eyeball, she squirted on the top of the eyelid, it ran down my face. I wasn’t impressed and was getting frustrated with the pain, snapped at her “No, not there – in the eye!” but the nurse just put my oxygen mask back on walked off!
Finally the Doctor came back, I explained what had happened, and she reassured me that she will get the nurse back with more saline. She also apologised that an Eye Doctor was not available in Beaumont; they needed to get one over from Mater. It would be tomorrow before he could see me. Brilliant, bloody brilliant! I started to get very upset – the pain was unbearable! The doctor tried to calm me down saying best they could offer was some painkilling eye drops for now, I agreed. While waiting for the eye drops I begged for more saline to dull the burning in the eye; the doctor agreed and a few minutes later the Nurse came back. This time she had a syringe, opening my eye she squirted saline onto my eyeball which really burned like mad!!! Howling with the initial pain of the burn, I removed my oxygen mask. She replaced it, I took it off again and she jammed it back on! I asked if I could please hold the saline and do it myself, but she refused. She then put an eye patch on the eye really roughly... I pulled her hand back and she slapped my hand! Whoa! WTF! I was in shock! Who gave this cow a job as a nurse!? She got up and walked away... 3 minutes later she came back took off the eyepatch and poured this cream from a tube into my eye. The cream stung for a moment (cue - more whimpers from me!) before the cooling action began to work and I was able to calm down. Then the Nurse from Hell (NFH) opened the curtains, seeing all the other ladies and their visitors staring at me (it was 3pm at this stage) I was mortified!
Mum came in with my 4 year old daughter, Théa, I was so glad to see them! Poor Théa was in shock to see me with eye patch, bandage, oxygen mask – she just stood there in shock, wouldn’t come near me! They didn’t stay too long as I was drifting in/out of sleep. NFH came back with BP, Temperature and pulse thingys; she woke me up jabbing the temperature probe deep into my right ear – I winced! The people were still there all looking on at me, catching sight of the male nurse-aid – I asked him to draw the curtains for some privacy, which he did. Still tired I drifted into a light sleep.
I woke up 3 hours later, the burning sensation in my eye was back, the curtains was open, lights in ward on full blast, my overhead light was on and the gauze was coming away from the eye... ringing the pager, the NFH came, I removed the oxygen mask to ask for the curtains to be drawn and more cream for eye, explaining it was burning up again. She shook her head at me, said something – I asked for my glasses as I couldn’t see her to lip-read what she was saying (didn’t have my hearing aids on either)... she gave the glasses to me and walked away. Grrr! What was the point of talking then giving me my glasses, then walking away?! Not very deaf friendly, are we, eh? Ringing the pager again – the Nurses-Aid came in. I asked him to close curtains and turn off the light over my bed, please. He nodded. I them asked for some water as my mouth was really dry... He went off to ask, before coming back with a cup of water and a paper bowl, I was only allowed to rinse my mouth and take one small slip. Bliss! Barely 2 mins later NFH comes back, whips the curtains back and tells me off!
-“You cannot have this curtain closed – we need to keep an eye on you!”
-“I’m finding the light too strong, my eye is sore again can I have more ointment on please?”
-“No! You have eye patch – that’s enough! Put that oxygen mask back on NOW!”
30 mins later, I was bursting for a pee... urgh! Pressing the bell with trepidation, the Nurse-Aid came... told him I badly needed toilet. ‘No problem - one moment.... ‘ off he went then came back with bed-pan! LOL! You gotta be joking me!? No, he was deadly serious, pulling curtains around the bed, started to pull back covers, lift my gown... and deftly placed the pan under my bum... I was in shock! But thinking I had a choice between him and the NFH, I was really in no position to complain! But I was so embarrassed – I couldn’t pee! I was BURSTING to go but I couldn’t! After 3 long minutes, I told him it wasn’t working. He went off and came back with a commode chair... I hope that was to bring me into the toilet but he nodded said no, I had to use it there(!) Helping me out of the bed for the first time, releasing my drip, I was about to sit down – NFS pulls the curtain back exposing my bum to the people visiting the lady in the bed opposite me!!! She pulled it back but I was soooooo embarrassed! I started sobbing my eyes out in frustration! I still couldn’t go... it took 10 minutes for me to calm down and relaxed enough to pee! When it was over, I asked Nurse-Aid to leave curtains closed but he shook his head sadly ‘sorry but the Staff Nurses says we have to keep them open...’
As they moved the bed to push in the commode the cup of water got knocked over and wet the bed clothes. My drip had leaked onto my gown (which was same one I wore for the operation) NFH came back, started tutting about the wet bedclothes/gown, and made a big deal about changing the sheets. The curtains were still open - god only knows what the visitors and the other ladies must have been thinking! That I soiled the bed and my gown?! I vowed to complain about NFH... her unsympathetic manner; lack of deaf awareness and non-respect for my dignity was just awful!
The crying episode I had earlier helped cool the eye a bit, but it made my eye patch really damp, so I removed it. Realising the grit or whatever it was had moved, I could feel it just under my eyelid. Grabbing a tissue, I dipped it into what was left of the water in the cup and gently rubbed under the eyelid – and it came out! The eye was still burning, spotting the eye cream on my bedside locker, I never noticed it before! Feck NFH! Grabbing it, I read the instruction paper inside, and following it poured some cream into my eye... Ah the blessed relief!
One hour later when the night shift nurses came on – I was still sitting up in the chair beside my bed with oxygen mask on. I had been waiting for NFH to put me back in my bed but she never came back! I asked one of the night nurse if I can take off the oxygen mask, she agreed. The catering staff came around with tea/coffee/biscuits at 10pm – I was suddenly ravenous! Asking the night nurse if I was allowed to have tea? She checked my chart – ‘Any sickness, or dizziness today?’ I said no. She then instructed the catering staff to give me a cup of tea and two digestive biscuits! It was best tea and biscuits ever!
Realising I needed to pee again... called the Nurse; she asked if I was able to walk. I nodded – I hadn’t a clue if I was able but I was determined to go to the toilet and not face the commode again! She helped me up and I managed to walk holding on to tables, walls... no dizziness, just was slightly off balance. Nurse offered to help me change out of the gown into my pyjamas. Washed my face, hands, got more eye cream and felt soooo much better going back to my bed! I had to sleep in a semi-sitting position, which I didn’t mind.
Was woken by nurse at 6am to take my BP, temperature, pulse and get measured for my white anti-clotting stockings. Got the stockings and gown at 7am, went for my shower. I didn’t bother washing my hair – most CI’ees told me that they washed their hair but said it was a waste of time; my hair was still clean from previous day so I left it. Went back to my bed, read my book, did a video diary entry via PC Webcam (don’t have permission to use camera in ward but can use PC webcam) and waited to be brought down to theatre.
Trolley came for me at 11am, I had expected to leave my hearing-aids at my bed and just bring my glasses but they said no, only hearing aids allowed in-situ in Theatre, not glasses! Was dismayed – my lip-reading skills is way better than my residual hearing, would rather have my glasses over the HA’s any day!
The guy pushing my trolley was a total joker very easy to understand, while waiting for the lift he started teasing this skinny petite blonde nurse carrying my file; as another trolley with patient came to share our lift he teased our nurse that there wouldn’t be room for her in lift! When the lift came – it was tiny! But they managed to fit two trolleys in side by side with the Joker plus the other guy pushing them plus two ward nurses... The Joker turned on my nurse “Wow! You manage to fit in did ya? Go on, I let ya push the button – pick any button...” as the lift went up instead of down to the Theatre floor, the Joker drawled at me really seriously “Jaysus, ya can’t trust a blonde to know the difference between up and down these days, can ya?” We all burst out laughing... The blonde nurse included! Great way to break the nervous tension I must add!
As I got into the Theatre waiting room, the blonde nurse handed my file to an African Theatre Nurse, who proceeded to talk to me – I was totally at loss! I didn’t understand her at all, not sure if it was because she was a non-national (very difficult to lip-read) or the fact I couldn’t see her clearly... I started apologising that I hadn’t my glasses on to see her properly. She gave poor Nurse Blonde a right ticking off for not allowing me to bring my glasses! She started to tick various boxes on my file, dumping my file on my bed and wandered off. I was curious and miffed to see what she had ticked for me, wanted to ensure she had put correct info but spotted nothing serious or incorrect... glancing thru the papers I noticed my blood test results had some odd results which concerned me – spotting a different name on top of the page ‘James ...’ waving Nurse Blonde over – I pointed it out to her silently, she gasped then removed the papers quickly before the Theatre Nurse came back to take my file adding the docket to clear me for admission into the Theatre. Just hope they had my results going in!
I was in the pre-theatre room for 5 minutes, saying hello to various people setting up my EGG monitor, drips, etc., none of whom I had met before! None of the team who visited my bed yesterday appeared either! Then the door opened and Dr Viani appeared –I was so glad to see a familiar face! Was having a moment that I might be in the wrong theatre! She grasped my hand and spoke to me – I motioned her to come forward as I couldn’t lip-read without my glasses. She repeated her greeting adding if I was alright, I nodded, asking if I would be implanted with the AB implant as I had hoped. She shook her head: ‘No I will be implanting you with the Nucleus. The Cochlear Nucleus is a more stable product. I would need to do a different operation for Advance Bionic Implant - I don’t have enough practice on implanting them just yet. Trust me, the Nucleus has a proven excellent track results, you will be fine.... Okay?’ She smiled at me, patting my arm reassuringly. I nodded. Instead of getting my aesthentic by injection into the drip, I got it via mask... it took forever! I must have counted to 50-something before I went under!
Coming around in the recovery room, I was in a sitting up position with oxygen mask on. Putting my hand up to my head, I felt the bandage but it wasn’t as big or tight as I was lead to believe. The doctor with the firm handshake from yesterday appeared. For some strange reason I thought, they didn’t do the operation! That I was opened up and closed again with no implant! Then suddenly I felt a horrible burning sensation in my right eye!
I asked “Did you do the implant? Is it over?”
-‘Oh yes, it went really well! Are you in pain?’
-‘There’s something in my eye – something sticking into it...’
-‘Okay, I’ll have a look... it looks red, can’t see anything, will get saline to wash it...’
When she came back with saline – two drops and my eyeball burned! ‘Owwww! ‘ I cried out, she backed off, “no, it is just initial burning – it’s still there, can you put more in please...” she poured the rest of the saline in, the relief was good but only temporary. I could feel the grit was still there scraping the eyeball as I moved my eye. Urrgh! I asked for the saline wash 3 times more, but no avail – the grit or whatever it was wasn’t shifting.
I don’t remember getting back to my ward, but the Ward doctor appeared concerned about the eye, which was getting worse. Begging for more saline to wash out the grit, she reassured me that they were trying to locate an Eye doctor for me. I kept asking, begging, for the saline – my eyeball was burning like mad! Finally a nurse appeared with the saline droplets as the doctor ran off to make a phone call - opening my eyelid, I asked the Nurse to put some on the top of eyeball, she squirted on the top of the eyelid, it ran down my face. I wasn’t impressed and was getting frustrated with the pain, snapped at her “No, not there – in the eye!” but the nurse just put my oxygen mask back on walked off!
Finally the Doctor came back, I explained what had happened, and she reassured me that she will get the nurse back with more saline. She also apologised that an Eye Doctor was not available in Beaumont; they needed to get one over from Mater. It would be tomorrow before he could see me. Brilliant, bloody brilliant! I started to get very upset – the pain was unbearable! The doctor tried to calm me down saying best they could offer was some painkilling eye drops for now, I agreed. While waiting for the eye drops I begged for more saline to dull the burning in the eye; the doctor agreed and a few minutes later the Nurse came back. This time she had a syringe, opening my eye she squirted saline onto my eyeball which really burned like mad!!! Howling with the initial pain of the burn, I removed my oxygen mask. She replaced it, I took it off again and she jammed it back on! I asked if I could please hold the saline and do it myself, but she refused. She then put an eye patch on the eye really roughly... I pulled her hand back and she slapped my hand! Whoa! WTF! I was in shock! Who gave this cow a job as a nurse!? She got up and walked away... 3 minutes later she came back took off the eyepatch and poured this cream from a tube into my eye. The cream stung for a moment (cue - more whimpers from me!) before the cooling action began to work and I was able to calm down. Then the Nurse from Hell (NFH) opened the curtains, seeing all the other ladies and their visitors staring at me (it was 3pm at this stage) I was mortified!
Mum came in with my 4 year old daughter, Théa, I was so glad to see them! Poor Théa was in shock to see me with eye patch, bandage, oxygen mask – she just stood there in shock, wouldn’t come near me! They didn’t stay too long as I was drifting in/out of sleep. NFH came back with BP, Temperature and pulse thingys; she woke me up jabbing the temperature probe deep into my right ear – I winced! The people were still there all looking on at me, catching sight of the male nurse-aid – I asked him to draw the curtains for some privacy, which he did. Still tired I drifted into a light sleep.
I woke up 3 hours later, the burning sensation in my eye was back, the curtains was open, lights in ward on full blast, my overhead light was on and the gauze was coming away from the eye... ringing the pager, the NFH came, I removed the oxygen mask to ask for the curtains to be drawn and more cream for eye, explaining it was burning up again. She shook her head at me, said something – I asked for my glasses as I couldn’t see her to lip-read what she was saying (didn’t have my hearing aids on either)... she gave the glasses to me and walked away. Grrr! What was the point of talking then giving me my glasses, then walking away?! Not very deaf friendly, are we, eh? Ringing the pager again – the Nurses-Aid came in. I asked him to close curtains and turn off the light over my bed, please. He nodded. I them asked for some water as my mouth was really dry... He went off to ask, before coming back with a cup of water and a paper bowl, I was only allowed to rinse my mouth and take one small slip. Bliss! Barely 2 mins later NFH comes back, whips the curtains back and tells me off!
-“You cannot have this curtain closed – we need to keep an eye on you!”
-“I’m finding the light too strong, my eye is sore again can I have more ointment on please?”
-“No! You have eye patch – that’s enough! Put that oxygen mask back on NOW!”
30 mins later, I was bursting for a pee... urgh! Pressing the bell with trepidation, the Nurse-Aid came... told him I badly needed toilet. ‘No problem - one moment.... ‘ off he went then came back with bed-pan! LOL! You gotta be joking me!? No, he was deadly serious, pulling curtains around the bed, started to pull back covers, lift my gown... and deftly placed the pan under my bum... I was in shock! But thinking I had a choice between him and the NFH, I was really in no position to complain! But I was so embarrassed – I couldn’t pee! I was BURSTING to go but I couldn’t! After 3 long minutes, I told him it wasn’t working. He went off and came back with a commode chair... I hope that was to bring me into the toilet but he nodded said no, I had to use it there(!) Helping me out of the bed for the first time, releasing my drip, I was about to sit down – NFS pulls the curtain back exposing my bum to the people visiting the lady in the bed opposite me!!! She pulled it back but I was soooooo embarrassed! I started sobbing my eyes out in frustration! I still couldn’t go... it took 10 minutes for me to calm down and relaxed enough to pee! When it was over, I asked Nurse-Aid to leave curtains closed but he shook his head sadly ‘sorry but the Staff Nurses says we have to keep them open...’
As they moved the bed to push in the commode the cup of water got knocked over and wet the bed clothes. My drip had leaked onto my gown (which was same one I wore for the operation) NFH came back, started tutting about the wet bedclothes/gown, and made a big deal about changing the sheets. The curtains were still open - god only knows what the visitors and the other ladies must have been thinking! That I soiled the bed and my gown?! I vowed to complain about NFH... her unsympathetic manner; lack of deaf awareness and non-respect for my dignity was just awful!
The crying episode I had earlier helped cool the eye a bit, but it made my eye patch really damp, so I removed it. Realising the grit or whatever it was had moved, I could feel it just under my eyelid. Grabbing a tissue, I dipped it into what was left of the water in the cup and gently rubbed under the eyelid – and it came out! The eye was still burning, spotting the eye cream on my bedside locker, I never noticed it before! Feck NFH! Grabbing it, I read the instruction paper inside, and following it poured some cream into my eye... Ah the blessed relief!
One hour later when the night shift nurses came on – I was still sitting up in the chair beside my bed with oxygen mask on. I had been waiting for NFH to put me back in my bed but she never came back! I asked one of the night nurse if I can take off the oxygen mask, she agreed. The catering staff came around with tea/coffee/biscuits at 10pm – I was suddenly ravenous! Asking the night nurse if I was allowed to have tea? She checked my chart – ‘Any sickness, or dizziness today?’ I said no. She then instructed the catering staff to give me a cup of tea and two digestive biscuits! It was best tea and biscuits ever!
Realising I needed to pee again... called the Nurse; she asked if I was able to walk. I nodded – I hadn’t a clue if I was able but I was determined to go to the toilet and not face the commode again! She helped me up and I managed to walk holding on to tables, walls... no dizziness, just was slightly off balance. Nurse offered to help me change out of the gown into my pyjamas. Washed my face, hands, got more eye cream and felt soooo much better going back to my bed! I had to sleep in a semi-sitting position, which I didn’t mind.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Greetings from the hospital bed!
Yes I’m here already! I shouldn’t have spoken too son, eh?! LOL! What a mad panic today was! I slept in having drifted to sleep sometime around 4:30am. My son called me at 7:45am... groan!
Getting up, I discovered that my four year old daughter had gotten ill in the night and instead of waking me she got into the bed beside me, with a trail of vomit from her bed to mine! URGH! By the time I cleaned up, got washed dressed etc. Hopped into car with my son, I drove him to school (15 mins late...) then sped off in the direction of Kildare where I had my first morning appointment at 10am. Or so I thought.
Upon realising it was actually at 10:30am, I decided to stop off at Kildare Outlet and do some PTCs for the video diary. A security guard kindly pointed me in the direction of the site management office to seek permission which took aaagggggeeesss. Then I had to dash for my appointment!
I left my phone in the car during the visit, which ended at 12:15pm. Once back in the car I noticed I had 5 missed calls and 6 messages(!) From work, au pair at home, my mum and Beaumont Hospital. I was to go in at 1:30pm! My bed was ready! Arrrragh!
Flying back down the M/N7 to Dublin, I text Ray to give him the update and see if he was available to bring me or should I get a taxi? He replied that he was bringing me in and would take his lunch hour to do it. Dropping files and stuff off at my work, gave up trying to set my out-of-office note (my PC froze!) I sprinted down the M50 to my house to drop off car, grab my bag. The lights on the M50/N3 roundabout were out causing a huge jam. Once home I checked on my daughter (running a temperature now.... gulp!) and gave her medicine. It was 2pm by the time I was finally on my way to the hospital!
On arrival I was sent to St Anne’s Ward. The nurse brought me over to two empty beds and asked me to pick one; I choose the one beside the window that had a lovely view of a beech tree: Bed 16. I am sharing the room with four auld ladies! My nurse also informed me I had missed dinner and tea wouldn’t be until 5pm. Realising how hungry I was, I set off to the cafe and treated myself to lasagne and salad. Came back to the ward and met the doctor who gave me a through going over, questioned my medical history, family traits, take bloods etc. Ray, who had dropped me at the hospital door then went back to work earlier, came in to see how I was before he headed off home. The surgical team popped by to say hello, that they will see me in the Morning. I asked what time would it be, the young female doctor who introduced herself to me with a firm handshake (I’ve forgotten her name!) replied that there was two of us for surgery tomorrow – myself and a child. They will take us first come first served... I am selfishly hoping I will go in first as waiting around all morning will be tough for me!
My nurse came back to take my BP, temperature and pulse – the first of many! She announced I had a slight temperature, hmmm? Could be all the running about I did earlier or the boiling hot radiator beside my bed (which I turned off!) I’m very calm today –tired from the lack of sleep over the past few days, hopefully I’ll sleep well tonight.
Settling back to watch one of Susie’s DVDs – I was dismayed to discover House (which I was so looking forward to watching) was Region 1. Grrrrrr! Need to get hold of manuals or advice online as to how to change the region settings to multi-region! Have to settle for first series of 24 or Prison Break (neither of which I am really in the mood for) or get back into David Kelly’s Poker Player Tales book... with some chocolate... cold 7up. Hmmmm! Now that’s a plan!
I decided to write this report first! Going for a walk to the shop now... might as well before I am completely bedridden for the next few days...
Getting up, I discovered that my four year old daughter had gotten ill in the night and instead of waking me she got into the bed beside me, with a trail of vomit from her bed to mine! URGH! By the time I cleaned up, got washed dressed etc. Hopped into car with my son, I drove him to school (15 mins late...) then sped off in the direction of Kildare where I had my first morning appointment at 10am. Or so I thought.
Upon realising it was actually at 10:30am, I decided to stop off at Kildare Outlet and do some PTCs for the video diary. A security guard kindly pointed me in the direction of the site management office to seek permission which took aaagggggeeesss. Then I had to dash for my appointment!
I left my phone in the car during the visit, which ended at 12:15pm. Once back in the car I noticed I had 5 missed calls and 6 messages(!) From work, au pair at home, my mum and Beaumont Hospital. I was to go in at 1:30pm! My bed was ready! Arrrragh!
Flying back down the M/N7 to Dublin, I text Ray to give him the update and see if he was available to bring me or should I get a taxi? He replied that he was bringing me in and would take his lunch hour to do it. Dropping files and stuff off at my work, gave up trying to set my out-of-office note (my PC froze!) I sprinted down the M50 to my house to drop off car, grab my bag. The lights on the M50/N3 roundabout were out causing a huge jam. Once home I checked on my daughter (running a temperature now.... gulp!) and gave her medicine. It was 2pm by the time I was finally on my way to the hospital!
On arrival I was sent to St Anne’s Ward. The nurse brought me over to two empty beds and asked me to pick one; I choose the one beside the window that had a lovely view of a beech tree: Bed 16. I am sharing the room with four auld ladies! My nurse also informed me I had missed dinner and tea wouldn’t be until 5pm. Realising how hungry I was, I set off to the cafe and treated myself to lasagne and salad. Came back to the ward and met the doctor who gave me a through going over, questioned my medical history, family traits, take bloods etc. Ray, who had dropped me at the hospital door then went back to work earlier, came in to see how I was before he headed off home. The surgical team popped by to say hello, that they will see me in the Morning. I asked what time would it be, the young female doctor who introduced herself to me with a firm handshake (I’ve forgotten her name!) replied that there was two of us for surgery tomorrow – myself and a child. They will take us first come first served... I am selfishly hoping I will go in first as waiting around all morning will be tough for me!
My nurse came back to take my BP, temperature and pulse – the first of many! She announced I had a slight temperature, hmmm? Could be all the running about I did earlier or the boiling hot radiator beside my bed (which I turned off!) I’m very calm today –tired from the lack of sleep over the past few days, hopefully I’ll sleep well tonight.
Settling back to watch one of Susie’s DVDs – I was dismayed to discover House (which I was so looking forward to watching) was Region 1. Grrrrrr! Need to get hold of manuals or advice online as to how to change the region settings to multi-region! Have to settle for first series of 24 or Prison Break (neither of which I am really in the mood for) or get back into David Kelly’s Poker Player Tales book... with some chocolate... cold 7up. Hmmmm! Now that’s a plan!
I decided to write this report first! Going for a walk to the shop now... might as well before I am completely bedridden for the next few days...
Monday, November 2, 2009
Craby! Craby! Craby!
Two days to go and I’m in a foul mood today - snapping at people, finding faults and nit-picking the small things. I even burst into tears at one point for no reason!
I’m blaming the conversation I unintentionally got involved with, we started talking about hearing aids and the topic drifted into CIs. Before I could mention that I was going for a CI, one person started talking about someone who had a CI, how that person ‘used to be intelligent’ but now ‘acts thick... it’s her CI, it damaged her brain!’ (!?) Another person pointed out a ‘friend’ of his got CI because he wanted to have‘hearing girlfriends’... cue laughter. I was stunned! Will people think that I am getting the CI because I want to get a hearing boyfriend?! Or that I will by lobotomized by the CI and be forever ‘damaged’?!
There are several things I expect from getting a CI:
1 – Use the Telephone again! I recall using the telephone much easier 10-15 years ago, but gradually lost my confidence as my hearing declined. I would really like to do this again
2 – Hear the radio/iPod. So much information is spread via radio, my kids always demand the radio on in the car; I would avoid traffic jams if I had advance warning of same via the traffic station! I envy those who can use a radio/ipod to pass the time on long journeys/poker games etc. I’ve done a few radio interviews but can’t hear what I’ve said, what was kept in/left out, how did I come across!
3 – Follow a group conversation. I cope and communicate well one-to-one but am always lost in groups. Family gatherings can be boring; I miss out on valuable information in poker games when I can’t follow the player banter, I miss vital words that could help me to read a player;
I got my hospital bag packed – I’ve way too much stuff to bring with me: 6-7 pyjamas; dressing gown; hoodie; toiletries; slippers; underwear; laptop; DVDs; books; DV camera & tripod for my video diary; special pillow; notepad and pens... and I am still thinking I’ve forgotten something!!!
A special visit from Debbie Ennis to my home this evening was a godsend – she reassured me by recounting the various experiences that she and 3 of her children experienced going for CIs. They all were affected differently. It helped to calm me down, but I am still restless! Right now its 3am... I am all jittery and unable to sleep!
I have a busy day in work tomorrow, during which I have to call the hospital between 3-5pm to check if a bed is available... I’ve a feeling that there won’t be one and I’ll have to hold on til Wednesday morning. Ah Time will tell!
I’m blaming the conversation I unintentionally got involved with, we started talking about hearing aids and the topic drifted into CIs. Before I could mention that I was going for a CI, one person started talking about someone who had a CI, how that person ‘used to be intelligent’ but now ‘acts thick... it’s her CI, it damaged her brain!’ (!?) Another person pointed out a ‘friend’ of his got CI because he wanted to have‘hearing girlfriends’... cue laughter. I was stunned! Will people think that I am getting the CI because I want to get a hearing boyfriend?! Or that I will by lobotomized by the CI and be forever ‘damaged’?!
There are several things I expect from getting a CI:
1 – Use the Telephone again! I recall using the telephone much easier 10-15 years ago, but gradually lost my confidence as my hearing declined. I would really like to do this again
2 – Hear the radio/iPod. So much information is spread via radio, my kids always demand the radio on in the car; I would avoid traffic jams if I had advance warning of same via the traffic station! I envy those who can use a radio/ipod to pass the time on long journeys/poker games etc. I’ve done a few radio interviews but can’t hear what I’ve said, what was kept in/left out, how did I come across!
3 – Follow a group conversation. I cope and communicate well one-to-one but am always lost in groups. Family gatherings can be boring; I miss out on valuable information in poker games when I can’t follow the player banter, I miss vital words that could help me to read a player;
I got my hospital bag packed – I’ve way too much stuff to bring with me: 6-7 pyjamas; dressing gown; hoodie; toiletries; slippers; underwear; laptop; DVDs; books; DV camera & tripod for my video diary; special pillow; notepad and pens... and I am still thinking I’ve forgotten something!!!
A special visit from Debbie Ennis to my home this evening was a godsend – she reassured me by recounting the various experiences that she and 3 of her children experienced going for CIs. They all were affected differently. It helped to calm me down, but I am still restless! Right now its 3am... I am all jittery and unable to sleep!
I have a busy day in work tomorrow, during which I have to call the hospital between 3-5pm to check if a bed is available... I’ve a feeling that there won’t be one and I’ll have to hold on til Wednesday morning. Ah Time will tell!
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Things I want to hear...
1 - Follow the Radio
Driving in car or via an iPod
2 - Attend Live Shows
particularly comedy shows and drama, I adore Tim Minchin
3 - Use the Telephone again
Yes 'again', I used to be comfortable with it one upon a time but...
4 - Follow the group banter
At the party, around the poker table, dinner soirees and work meetings
5 - Go to the cinema anytime anywhere, see any movie...
This would be a amazing thing to do - no more limited to Monday nights or Saturday mornings and not being able to see what I hope will be subtitled then finding out kits not and having to wait for the DVD.
6 - Hear my children in the next room
I never know whats going on in the next room when I'm not in it, often the children are outside playing, in the kitchen when I'm in sitting room, playing upstairs etc.
Just hope I'm not being too optimistic!
Driving in car or via an iPod
2 - Attend Live Shows
particularly comedy shows and drama, I adore Tim Minchin
3 - Use the Telephone again
Yes 'again', I used to be comfortable with it one upon a time but...
4 - Follow the group banter
At the party, around the poker table, dinner soirees and work meetings
5 - Go to the cinema anytime anywhere, see any movie...
This would be a amazing thing to do - no more limited to Monday nights or Saturday mornings and not being able to see what I hope will be subtitled then finding out kits not and having to wait for the DVD.
6 - Hear my children in the next room
I never know whats going on in the next room when I'm not in it, often the children are outside playing, in the kitchen when I'm in sitting room, playing upstairs etc.
Just hope I'm not being too optimistic!
Three days and counting...
I did something weird tonight...
The battery in my right hearing aid (the best ear) went. Instead of replacing it, I just took it out and spent the evening using my left hearing aid, an unsubconscious valiant effort I guess, to remember how my current residual hearing sounds like - before it is gone for good.
I currently hear a strong resonating 'NNN' sound in my left ear. Dull, flat, nasal, underwater - nnNNNnnnnermmmmm. Watching 'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' - I'm reading the subtitles: 'To the end...' and hearing: 'nu ne emmed'; while 'Seal it off!' is 'neam in omm'; and 'Fear, no doubt' is coming across as 'nea no mouunt'. The Tiger growls 'Nnrrrrrr! Nnrrrrr! NNNNNnrrrrrr!' It just hit me I have decent enough auditory perception - enough to describe just how I am hearing in the left ear... to know it isn't natural. Is it perceptive enough to enable me succeed with the CI?
Talking to Vincent McArdle this week about getting his implant at the age of 12/13, he told me how he found his father difficult to understand before he had his implant. I found this strange. Growing up I was able to understand both my parents.
My most vivid memory of my father is from when I was 9 years old: standing in the kitchen in front of the cooker; supervising a huge bubbling pot of indescribable-coloured soup with a kitchen towel thrown over his right shoulder surrounded by every pot, pan, spoon, fork, cup, dish lying around used and tossed aside... the child-me just arriving on the scene and looking around in stunned-fascinated horror. Knowing my house-proud clean-nik quick-tempered mother will go absolute SPARE at the this sight of my father still half-drunk, just woken from a sleep by Donny Collum. Probably after one of his legendary 2/3 day binge-drinking outings that I hear so much about now! He had tossed his dinner she had saved him into a saucepan with water, a few spoons from the catering tin of vegetable soup, scraps from the fridge (including the left over half-ring of black pudding!) and proceeded to make soup. As the list of ingredients grew, the soup got transferred to bigger and bigger pots til all that was left was the frying pan. My dad is talking and laughing with Donny. Donny opens the fridge, I watch as he sniffs a plate of fish (smoked cod I think!) and makes appreciative noises. I wrinkle my nose and declare fish as 'Yucky!' My Dad grimaces, turns to me and replies sadly: 'Ahhh Gilly... fish tastes beautiful! Beautiful! I LOVE fish... (smacking his lips loudly) beautiful fish! Beautiful!' And I understood every word he said. He died the following year, I struggle to remember his face at times but I remember his voice, those words... and play that scene over and over in my head.
Our mother on the other hand speaks with an almost neutral accent with a slight northern twang that gets more noticeable every time she is in Cavan. Her siblings have a far more pronounced accent than she does. Pointing this out to someone, who replied that it is natural to see our mothers voice as 'the neutral/normal accent' and everyone else in differing dialects away from this. Interesting theory? Does anyone agree?
Mum always speaks ninety-to-the-dozen, so fast I often pick her up totally 'arseways' as she puts it... she can whip between conversations carrying 2 or 3 topics simultaneously, which adds to the confusion too. When she was told that I was deaf she didn't bother changing her way of talking - I swear she decided there and then that I had either had to learn to follow 'her way or the highway!' Over the years I learnt to adjust and second guess the words I miss, successfully I might add; I do this for a lot of people, not just my Mum.
Recently this was brought to the fore by my 4-year-old daughter, sitting between Mum and me at my kitchen table; Théa often repeats things for me e.g. when the shop girl asks if I like 'cash-back' on my laser card and my head is turned - when I don't reply my daughter will tap me and interpret the conversation: "Maaaaam, she said: Do. You. Want. Cash. Back?" Emphasising each word fully and properly.
On this day, Mum was flying along in full-flow as usual; with me sitting there silently - getting one word in every four and 'expertly guessing' the rest! Théa kept tapping me on the arm to 'translate':
-Mam, Nanny's just said X had a baby...
-Mam, Nanny said X died last week...
-Mam, Nanny is talking about a man who....
You get the gist? When suddenly Mum just stops chattering mid-flow "Miss Théa, there's no need to repeat what I say, your mother understands EVERY word I'm saying!" Théa takes offence to this and pursing her lips primly in reply "No Nanny, she can't - she's DEAF and you are speaking TOO fast! Tut!" LOL! While I was admiring the innocent wisdom of my daughter, Mum stopped and looked at me, saying: "Well, once upon a time I think she used to be so much better at hearing me than she does now.... she takes up a lot of things areseways!"
-Yes Nanny. ARSEWAYS!
(AND you can't blame me for that one, Mum!)
I am looking forward (with trepidation if I'm honest) to seeing if their voices sound any different post-switch-on...
Just thinking about the operation is making me restless, I am not sleeping well at all! I better start packing my bag and sort out last minute stuff etc. I've just finalised my travel arrangements with my friend Ray, if there's a bed available on Tuesday he'll come over and pick me up. If I don't - I'll stay the night with them on Tuesday night and he'll bring me in early on Wednesday morning. I'm fasting from midnight.
Two more sleepless nights ahead... Just hope I get enough sleep in there to catch up on it!
The battery in my right hearing aid (the best ear) went. Instead of replacing it, I just took it out and spent the evening using my left hearing aid, an unsubconscious valiant effort I guess, to remember how my current residual hearing sounds like - before it is gone for good.
I currently hear a strong resonating 'NNN' sound in my left ear. Dull, flat, nasal, underwater - nnNNNnnnnermmmmm. Watching 'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' - I'm reading the subtitles: 'To the end...' and hearing: 'nu ne emmed'; while 'Seal it off!' is 'neam in omm'; and 'Fear, no doubt' is coming across as 'nea no mouunt'. The Tiger growls 'Nnrrrrrr! Nnrrrrr! NNNNNnrrrrrr!' It just hit me I have decent enough auditory perception - enough to describe just how I am hearing in the left ear... to know it isn't natural. Is it perceptive enough to enable me succeed with the CI?
Talking to Vincent McArdle this week about getting his implant at the age of 12/13, he told me how he found his father difficult to understand before he had his implant. I found this strange. Growing up I was able to understand both my parents.
My most vivid memory of my father is from when I was 9 years old: standing in the kitchen in front of the cooker; supervising a huge bubbling pot of indescribable-coloured soup with a kitchen towel thrown over his right shoulder surrounded by every pot, pan, spoon, fork, cup, dish lying around used and tossed aside... the child-me just arriving on the scene and looking around in stunned-fascinated horror. Knowing my house-proud clean-nik quick-tempered mother will go absolute SPARE at the this sight of my father still half-drunk, just woken from a sleep by Donny Collum. Probably after one of his legendary 2/3 day binge-drinking outings that I hear so much about now! He had tossed his dinner she had saved him into a saucepan with water, a few spoons from the catering tin of vegetable soup, scraps from the fridge (including the left over half-ring of black pudding!) and proceeded to make soup. As the list of ingredients grew, the soup got transferred to bigger and bigger pots til all that was left was the frying pan. My dad is talking and laughing with Donny. Donny opens the fridge, I watch as he sniffs a plate of fish (smoked cod I think!) and makes appreciative noises. I wrinkle my nose and declare fish as 'Yucky!' My Dad grimaces, turns to me and replies sadly: 'Ahhh Gilly... fish tastes beautiful! Beautiful! I LOVE fish... (smacking his lips loudly) beautiful fish! Beautiful!' And I understood every word he said. He died the following year, I struggle to remember his face at times but I remember his voice, those words... and play that scene over and over in my head.
Our mother on the other hand speaks with an almost neutral accent with a slight northern twang that gets more noticeable every time she is in Cavan. Her siblings have a far more pronounced accent than she does. Pointing this out to someone, who replied that it is natural to see our mothers voice as 'the neutral/normal accent' and everyone else in differing dialects away from this. Interesting theory? Does anyone agree?
Mum always speaks ninety-to-the-dozen, so fast I often pick her up totally 'arseways' as she puts it... she can whip between conversations carrying 2 or 3 topics simultaneously, which adds to the confusion too. When she was told that I was deaf she didn't bother changing her way of talking - I swear she decided there and then that I had either had to learn to follow 'her way or the highway!' Over the years I learnt to adjust and second guess the words I miss, successfully I might add; I do this for a lot of people, not just my Mum.
Recently this was brought to the fore by my 4-year-old daughter, sitting between Mum and me at my kitchen table; Théa often repeats things for me e.g. when the shop girl asks if I like 'cash-back' on my laser card and my head is turned - when I don't reply my daughter will tap me and interpret the conversation: "Maaaaam, she said: Do. You. Want. Cash. Back?" Emphasising each word fully and properly.
On this day, Mum was flying along in full-flow as usual; with me sitting there silently - getting one word in every four and 'expertly guessing' the rest! Théa kept tapping me on the arm to 'translate':
-Mam, Nanny's just said X had a baby...
-Mam, Nanny said X died last week...
-Mam, Nanny is talking about a man who....
You get the gist? When suddenly Mum just stops chattering mid-flow "Miss Théa, there's no need to repeat what I say, your mother understands EVERY word I'm saying!" Théa takes offence to this and pursing her lips primly in reply "No Nanny, she can't - she's DEAF and you are speaking TOO fast! Tut!" LOL! While I was admiring the innocent wisdom of my daughter, Mum stopped and looked at me, saying: "Well, once upon a time I think she used to be so much better at hearing me than she does now.... she takes up a lot of things areseways!"
-Yes Nanny. ARSEWAYS!
(AND you can't blame me for that one, Mum!)
I am looking forward (with trepidation if I'm honest) to seeing if their voices sound any different post-switch-on...
Just thinking about the operation is making me restless, I am not sleeping well at all! I better start packing my bag and sort out last minute stuff etc. I've just finalised my travel arrangements with my friend Ray, if there's a bed available on Tuesday he'll come over and pick me up. If I don't - I'll stay the night with them on Tuesday night and he'll bring me in early on Wednesday morning. I'm fasting from midnight.
Two more sleepless nights ahead... Just hope I get enough sleep in there to catch up on it!
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